these days, I have to remind myself to stop and breathe in life. love the little lovely things. like the awesome card from your bff: or the valentine from your dear friends and their BABY… their beautiful, wonderful babe: or remembering to watch your all-time favorite movie near enough to valentine's: I swear I interpret… Continue reading lovely little things.
Today has quietly come. Last year, on January 21st, I finally exhaled. I had survived one year. I had made it a year since my huge — life threatening/changing — accident. It's been two years. Two years. In 2013, I survived. It was a whole year in survival mode. A painful and fragile existence. And… Continue reading TWO.
I'm up to my ears in final projects and films for the semester and I've lost my manfriend to his new mistress — the library/studying for finals. but somehow we found time to find a tree and find each other. I love this time of year… maybe more than ever before. being in the mountains… Continue reading merry + bright.
Class was cancelled this morning. After I was already sitting at the coffee shop, flustering to get all the scripts together that I need to read and making note of the loose ends I need to tie up, my three-hour class was cancelled and I have a couple hours to myself at this escape. So… Continue reading Step 1: Be Unrealistic.
Tomorrow Evan has day one of his 4.5 years of nursing school. Tuesday I start my last year, my thesis year, of my filmmaking masters degree.We'll both be working at our jobs as well.Phew.I am trying to brace myself for many things:• Our apartment never being tolerably clean.• Getting so exhaustedly short with Evan.• Feeling… Continue reading before this beautiful storm.
"heaps" is the answer to how much I miss Texas. but my heart is here… Listening to this all night and playing cards with my love made this night such wondrous affirmation.I will always be proud of, and grateful for, where I came from.And I will continue to be proud of where I am and… Continue reading …hooray.
There is not a break in life. I find myself saying yes to everything and wanting more. I find myself working hard and still wanting to create at the end of the day. I love this. I get this from my father. He would work all day at the post office then come home, put… Continue reading I am one and the same, I am useful and strange.
Man. It's 1:30 in the morning and here I am blahgging. After a semester of going crazy and going places and going far, I have to look back and evaluate. But I can't. I know I want more of that. More making films. More clicking with crews. More winning. More bike rides with besties. More… Continue reading only now.
The new year has been a weird time for me. It didn't feel quite new. I watched quietly as the calendars rolled over and I feared the arrival of today. Today is the one year anniversary of my accident. I continue to feel silly about how much I talk about that accident… how it comes… Continue reading one year. this year.
Tonight felt so much like what this used to feel like. Evan is gone. Backpacking. And this feels alone like I used to be. Alone. Staying up late, working on projects, drinking wine, listening to this: This whole album. And flipping through an old friend of a book, trying to help a commenter who got… Continue reading frictioning geometry.
A day late, but still filled with love. I spent all day yesterday thinking about my amazing mother while I cleaned the house: did the dishes, all the laundry [done and folded], and weeded the garden to the extent of an insanely sore body today. So many thoughts went through my head about my momma.… Continue reading she has taught me.
wrote this down today: don't know why it rang so true today, but it did. I mean, it's not like I've ever done things I hate… but now I'm adamant on doing things I love. all the things I love, so many things… those. there's this photography project that I am very much in love… Continue reading random thoughts for may second.
As I said before, there are moments [strong, strong moments] that I want to remember from the time surrounding my accident. The night we came home from the hospital, I don't know if either of us thought we would ever sleep. Evan and I were both so exhausted, but as my face began to swell… Continue reading I want you to be here.
It's been two weeks now and I had hoped to talk to you about something other than my accident. The good news is that I'm looking good for a woman who tried to take out a tree with her face… It even looks better than that, but I can't get myself to take photos of… Continue reading sixty-five percent water.
It was a week ago today that I was in the ski accident. The ski accident where I lost control. Couldn't gain control. The ski accident where I hit a tree. With my face. Whiplash. Lost consciousness. Blood everywhere. The ski accident when I broke my nose and cheekbone and bit through my lip. The… Continue reading I want to be here.
I can't let 2012 slip into the memories without genuinely declaring it the best year yet. The blahg took a hit, I know I didn't give you much here, but real life flourished. I got to… • ski in Missoula with friends old and new. • celebrate my amazing manfriend with many Missoula friends at… Continue reading real life flourished.
The death plague that I've contracted from Jackson has given me pause with opportunity to document how wonderful the trip was. I didn't get to spend time with all my favorite lovelies, but I did get to soak up some supreme mountain time. [no energy for captions or correct spacing. just good times galore.] … Continue reading fox in the snow, diamond in the sky.
This is what Missoula looks like today from my view: The story I'm about to tell did not have the same snowy setting, but it was colder... about 20 degrees. This is what the door to our apartment looks like: Evan and I live nextdoor to this lovely woman named Suzie... who I hardly ever… Continue reading van me twice.
After getting back from a [wonderful, wonderful] trip to Texas, I came home to Evan's lovely family visiting us. They left the next day and Evan and I both would've guessed that we would just end up sleeping for the following 24 hours. Instead, we went on a little road trip. It was ah-mazing. Just… Continue reading VAN ROADTRIP // november twenty-twelve.
As sad as I am that I haven't been blahgging, it's way more tragic that I haven't been journaling. I read a quote about journaling that really hit me. I can't remember what it said [because apparently i write nothing down these days], but paraphrasing, it said, "People who say they keep a journal but… Continue reading ready for the next arrow.